COMING AUGUST 15, 2015
@ 6:30 PM (Doors @6PM)
at THE JUNGLE, ATLANTA
"Life's a Party, and my Honey-Buttered Pussy is the Piñata."
Georgia was born in the affluent suburbs of Greater Atlanta, in a pawnshop on the outskirts of Dunwoody. The daughter of two loving cousins, Georgia appreciated her debutante roots, but was soon lured to the siren song of performance art…and cocaine. Late night binges on Devil's Aspirin brought flashes of color and visions of greatness. Soon, she began experimenting with latex paint, transforming her Lady Garden into a variety of flowers. With bold strokes and soft brushes, Georgia was soon recognized as the "Prettiest Pussy Painter" Atlanta had ever seen. Her series, "Forbidden Fruit on Coochie Canvas" reached celebrity status at the Pine Street Shelter. She was destined for greater things, but alas, her story took an unfortunate turn. You see, Georgia's muse had turned against her. No longer was the Gutter Glitter inspiring her, it was robbing her. Georgia faded from the vibrant Pine Street arts scene, and was feared lost forever. Yet Georgia knew that the future held more, and like a smoke from a crackpipe, Georgia rose again. While the Star-Spangled Powder had taken her visions, it had not taken her desire to perform. Just like Atlanta, Georgia knew she could rebuild…She can now be seen regularly around the city, bringing smiles to the masses, and proving to us all that even in dark places, Georgia's pussy will find the light.
Roxanne Paperscissors grew up dirt poor in a meth lab in Cocke County, TN. She has few fond memories of her childhood but she always enjoyed her trips to Ingles with her mom to buy groceries which consisted mostly of household cleaners and Sudafed. She dreamed of a better place; a place where people wore shoes and had teeth. So one fearless day, she set out for New York. It took her nearly four years to realize that the big city that she landed in wasn't New York but rather Atlanta. It took her awhile to adjust to life in the big city. Roxanne forged ahead and found a career that could afford her designer shoes, a dentist, and the occasional nose candy as a treat (no more low end meth for her). She was destined to be a high end call girl.
"I like it big; Hair, heels, and EVERYTHING in between."
Miss Mona Rhodes was born in Chinquapin Park, Louisiana. As a child, a horse kicked her in the head. When she awoke, she had no recollection of what had happened to her. "Steel Magnolias" was on the tv in her hospital room, and she began to believe that she was Truvy. She grew up making her hair higher, her makeup heavier, and her clothes tighter & tackier.
As the years went on, she wanted to become a country singer. She wanted to move to Nashville, and move she did... to Nashville, GA. Mona couldn't understand why no one wanted to offer her a record deal, so she did the only thing a simple country girl could do; She began giving head for a quarter a blow in the Harvey's grocery store parking lot.
Fast forward 15 years, and Mona finally moved to Atlanta to be a career girl. She's still giving head in parking lots, but she's worked her way up to a dollar a blow, and now works the corners outside of finer chicken & waffles establishments across the metro area.
"Be good, or be good at it—and if you are, name it after me."
Trudencia Innunziata Carmello changed her name and moved to Atlanta in 2011. Her father nicknamed her "Dolce" ("sweet" in her native Italian); appropriate for the heiress to the Carmello Candy empire of Salt Lake City which specializes in decaffeinated chocolate for Mormons. Trudy's lifelong involvement in the family business helped her perfect Carmello's most popular candy, Missionary Milk Chocolate. The family's ties in the Mormon Mafia helped Trudy discover her unusual talents in fetish sex when she figured out that brawny hitmen like to be flogged with a Latter-Day Licorice Whip while clenching a Pearl of Great Price Jawbreaker in their teeth. It also didn't hurt that being around so much sugar her entire life that her "honey comb" tastes "sweeter than Skittles." Into "S&M, M&M's, and everything in between," Trudy proves that being soft and sweet can really make you hard.
"I don't have an innie - OR an outie."
Ivanna Gender was genetically engineered by the KGB during the height of the Cold War as part of the Soviet Reproductive Grotestification Program. Upon the immediate realization of their absolute and total failure with her they disposed of her to the local office of Mail Order Brooms (not quite brides, not quite grooms). She was not-so-quickly purchased and delivered to a prominent business in Atlanta, Georgia whom you probably know. Confused and frustrated he kindly donated her to the Cobb County Republican Party where she spent several nights in their sex dungeon before being moved to their beastiality gardens. Because of her Soviet Operative background it didn't take her long to escape. Much longer than most spies, and really just a little bit quicker than an average person, but definitely not long. She now lives on the streets and turns to anything she can to make a dollar. At night it's hooking and during the day it's modeling, mostly for the "after" pictures in the Meth: Never Once campaign.
"I make all my money... On the street."
After being born in Paris, France, her parents moved Rene Sance to the city of Atlanta. Though she was basically raised in Atlanta, for some reason Rene still believed she was and always will be French as proven by her consistent use of powder white face make up and Marie Antoinette wigs. After both her parents were killed in a mysterious beheading, Rene turned to the street for guidance. Ms. Sance thinks she is all that, and isn't afraid to tell you. But she's nothing more than a two-bit piece of ass that will sell you a slice for any spare change you have in your seat cushions. She'll then proceed to milk you for the change in your pants. There are many hos in Atlanta, but none is more refined in the art of working a corner than Rene Sance.
"I work hard standing up... and lying down."
Mathilda Francesca Naomi Kummz (Tilly F.N. Kummz) was the youngest of three from an upper class family in the Central Park area of Manhattan. Her street sisters often joke that she was born with a silver spoon in her ****. Despite her good breeding, sophisticated upbringing, and childhood of luxury, Tilly is trash. She has spent days at a time passed out in remote areas of Central Park and Queens and has her own solitary cell on permanent reserve at Rikers due to her propensity for resisting authority (where the phrase 'Tilly Timeout' originated). She has posed for Playboy, Hustler, and Knuckle, and has a recently discontinued character based on her in the illustrated Lemon People Magazine in Japan. She is often criticized because she believes the next generation of porn involves scratch-and-sniff in combination with Harry Potter-like moving images. Tilly was brought to Atlanta as part of a multi-tiered CDC study aimed at identifying unknown STDs, which is partially described in the Times article 'The Big Appledemic: Open Borders and Open Legs'. After her relocation to the south, Tilly decided to attempt more upscale endeavors by leaving the streets for Burlesque, where she hopes to find her place on stage singing and dancing in between her coughing fits.
"I might be new to the streets, but I'm no stranger to hitting the sheets!"
After winning her first beauty pageant in the womb as America's Most Beautiful Ultrasound, Gwendolyn Van Cartier was destined to be a star. Unfortunately the path of stardom for her wasn't paved in gold. When her father's semi successful combination liquor store, chicken franchise and weave shop (Finga Liquor Gud and Weave Emporium) went under due a grease fire igniting the weave and being further accelerated by the liquor. The Van Cartier's were left with nothing. Gwendolyn's mother being the astute business woman that she is seized the opportunity to promote her daughter's talent and put food on her family's table. Gwendolyn entered her first toddler beauty pageant with nothing more than a dress made out of a table cloth and a pocket full of dreams. After placing 1st, 2nd, and 3rd the Cartier's took the prize money and never looked back. After several years working the pageant circuit and desperate to escape her overbearing mother and parasitic family, she ran away to Atlanta to become a real actress. Now no stranger to any man's casting couch, Gwendolyn uses the talents she perfected in the pageant circle to literally bend over backwards to please her customers.
Dixie was born and raised on a plantation in Gayville, South Carolina, the only daughter of Pat and Phil McCootchie. Growing up, Dixie was fascinated with fashion, wig-styling, singing and dancing...and seeing her name in lights. She was also quite fascinated by the male anatomy. At the age of 16, Dixie was chosen Miss Magnolia Queen, but was unceremoniously stripped of her title after it was discovered she had performed favors of the oral variety for two of the three judges. Dixie was sent off to Miss MacGyver's Finishing School in hopes that she would learn the refinement of a true Southern lady.
After graduation, Dixie packed up her wigs, cosmetics, and oral skills and headed off for Music City. Dixie practiced her musical craft, and soon became an avid skin flute player, and even learned trombone... although she's a bit rusty. It wasn't long before Dixie's musical talents were noticed by top Country Music record executives, and she was promptly signed to B.J. Records. She garnered her first number one hit with the smash single "Talkin' to the Judge". She followed that with her next gold record, "Lolly-Gagging". Her third single, "Country Blumpkin" started a national line dancing craze called the "Mushroom Stamp"
After two Academy of Cuntry Music Awards, a successful HEAD-lining tour through Europe with her band, The Chicken-Chockers, and an induction into the Country Music Hall of Shame, Dixie's career began to slow down. She briefly revived her popularity with her gospel hit, "Drop Kick me Jesus, through the Goal Posts of Life", but she never returned to her former level of popularity. Dixie recently moved to Atlanta, GA, where is a full-time skin flute instructor. She is also very active in her local Baptist church, The Glory Hole, where she serves as music director and principle tongue-speaking interpreter.
All proceeds benefit Atlanta Gay Men's Chorus.
© 2015, HoSho Atlanta.